Leading Across Generations: Why Communication Breaks Down—and How to Fix It

One of the biggest challenges leaders face today isn’t technology, strategy, or even change—it’s communication. And nowhere is this more visible than in multigenerational teams.

“If you don’t reply in 10 minutes, Gen Z thinks you’re ghosting them. They don’t assume you’re thinking. They assume you’re ignoring them.” - Dr. Mary Donohue, an expert in generational behavior

Raised on real-time updates, Gen Z interprets silence as rejection. Boomers, on the other hand, may wait for a scheduled meeting to talk through issues. Gen X? They often fire off quick emails. Millennials? They might Slack you a bullet list.

These differences aren’t overdramatic—they’re brain training. Each generation grew up in a different communication ecosystem, and it shapes how they show up at work. If your team isn’t “breathing the same air,” as Donohue says, they’re not working well together.

So what’s a leader to do?

The “Why” Behind Miscommunication

• Boomers often expect formality and face-to-face time.

• Gen X tends to keep it efficient with short emails or quick pings.

• Millennials like collaborative, ongoing updates (Slack, project boards).

• Gen Z craves fast, continuous acknowledgment (emojis, reactions, quick responses).

It’s not that one is right and the others wrong. It’s that silence or delay means different things to each. For some, it’s patience. For others, it’s dismissal.

Understanding this helps leaders avoid frustration and start flexing their approach.

“Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” – Stephen Covey

Communication Tips

1. Acknowledge Early, Clarify Later Even if you don’t have the full answer, say “Got it, will update you tomorrow.” This small step builds massive trust.

2. Mix the Mediums Use the right channel for the right moment—email for details, video for connection, chat for quick updates.

3. Make Feedback Continuous Don’t wait for performance reviews. Quick recognition—whether spoken, typed, or emoji—creates momentum.

4. Name the Differences Out Loud Transparency diffuses tension: “I lean toward long emails. If that’s too much, let’s adjust how I update you.”

5. Create Shared Norms aka "rules of engagement" Decide as a team: response times, meeting styles, how wins are shared. Make it explicit, not assumed.

Reflect

• Which generation’s style is closest to your own?

• Where might your default create blind spots for others?

• What’s one communication norm your team could agree on this week to reduce friction?

• How can you flex your own style—without losing authenticity—to better connect with those different from you?

Books Worth Exploring

• Radical Candor by Kim Scott – balancing care with challenge in feedback.

• The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace by Gary Chapman & Paul White – how recognition lands differently.

• Sticking Points by Haydn Shaw – practical tools for leading across five generations.

Multigenerational leadership isn’t about age—it’s about adaptability. The strongest leaders treat communication as a toolkit, not a rulebook. By flexing your style, acknowledging differences, and setting shared norms, you’ll not only reduce miscommunication but also unlock the unique strengths each generation brings.

“Communication is oxygen.” – Dr. Mary Donohue

Because when communication flows, everyone breathes easier—and your team thrives together. If you’d like support strengthening your communication—whether in leadership or your personal relationships—I’d love to work with you.