Less Noise. More Intention.
Eight habits for a more aligned life.
Most leaders I coach don’t struggle because they lack ambition, discipline, or the ability to get things done.
They struggle because there’s too much competing for their attention.
The meetings. The messages. The responsibilities. The expectations. The constant feeling that there’s something else they should be doing.
Somewhere in all that activity, the things that matter most can quietly move to the background.
I’ve found myself returning to one particular resource with increasing frequency in my coaching conversations:
The Common Rule: Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction, by Justin Whitmel Earley.
It’s a simple framework built around eight daily and weekly habits. But what makes it valuable isn’t another set of things to accomplish. It’s the invitation to examine how we’re actually living.
Because there’s often a gap between what we say matters and what our daily habits reveal.
And that gap is where alignment begins.
The problem isn’t always time. It’s attention.
I frequently work with leaders who are successful by almost every external measure.
They’re capable, committed, and accustomed to carrying significant responsibility.
Yet they describe feeling distracted, disconnected, or stretched thin. They want to be more present with their families. More thoughtful in their decisions. More intentional about their health, relationships, and leadership.
But their schedules tell a different story.
Here’s a question I often ask:
If I looked at your calendar, your habits, and where your attention goes each day, would I be able to identify what you say matters most?
It’s a question worth sitting with.
We don’t build alignment simply by identifying our values. We build it through the choices we repeat.
That’s what makes The Common Rule so useful.
What is The Common Rule?
Justin Whitmel Earley developed The Common Rule after experiencing the consequences of a demanding professional life that had become disconnected from his deeper priorities.
As a lawyer, husband, and father, he recognized that good intentions weren’t enough. He needed daily practices that supported the kind of person he wanted to become.
His framework is grounded in Christian faith and organized around eight habits designed to deepen our relationship with God and others.
Four are practiced daily. Four are practiced weekly.
Some habits help us embrace what matters. Others help us resist the distractions that pull us away from it.
Although the framework is rooted in spiritual formation, it also raises important questions about how we lead ourselves, manage our attention, and create space for meaningful relationships.
Here are the eight habits and why I believe they’re worth considering.
Four daily habits
1. Kneeling prayer three times a day
Morning. Midday. Evening.
Earley encourages three intentional moments of prayer throughout the day.
The practice creates a rhythm of humility, gratitude, and reflection. It interrupts the tendency to move from one responsibility to the next without considering how we’re showing up.
For leaders, there’s a valuable principle here.
We need moments to reconnect with our intentions before our circumstances begin directing our behavior.
That might mean beginning the morning in prayer, pausing at midday to consider how you’re treating people, or ending the evening with gratitude and reflection.
The question isn’t simply, “What did I accomplish today?”
It’s also, “How did I show up?”
2. Eat one meal each day with others
This sounds simple.
But think about how frequently we eat while answering emails, scrolling through our phones, or rushing between commitments.
A shared meal creates an opportunity for connection.
Not networking. Not multitasking. Not another meeting.
Connection.
One of my core beliefs is that people matter more than problems.
Yet relationships often receive whatever attention remains after we’ve finished everything else.
This habit challenges that pattern. It reminds us that relationships need more than good intentions. They need time, presence, and attention.
3. Spend one hour each day with your phone off
Not on silent.
Off.
For one hour.
Consider how often we reach for our phones without thinking.
A notification arrives. We respond. Another message appears. We check something unrelated. Suddenly, our attention has moved in five different directions.
We may be accessible to everyone while becoming less present to the people and priorities directly in front of us.
For leaders, attention is a valuable resource.
Constant availability isn’t the same as effective leadership.
Try creating one uninterrupted hour each day.
Use it for focused work, conversation, reading, exercise, or simply being present.
Notice what changes when you’re no longer responding to everything around you.
4. Read Scripture before looking at your phone
Earley’s fourth daily habit is to begin the day with Scripture before engaging with your phone. The intention is to allow faith and truth to shape your perspective before the demands and distractions of the world begin competing for your attention.
I find the underlying question especially meaningful:
What gets to influence your thinking first?
For those who practice Christian faith, beginning with Scripture creates an opportunity to ground the day in something deeper than the latest headline or email.
It’s also a reminder that the way we begin our mornings often influences how we approach everything that follows.
Rather than immediately reacting to the world, we can choose to begin with intention.
Four weekly habits
5. Have one hour of meaningful conversation with a friend
Not a quick text.
Not a conversation squeezed between appointments.
An intentional hour with someone who knows you.
Someone with whom you can be honest.
Leaders frequently spend their days communicating with people while having very few conversations where they can simply be themselves.
There’s a difference between being surrounded by people and being connected to them. This habit encourages us to protect relationships where honesty, vulnerability, and mutual support are possible.
We all need people who know us beyond our titles, responsibilities, and accomplishments.
6. Curate your media to four hours per week
This habit challenges us to be intentional about the stories and information we consume.
Earley’s original framework recommends limiting recreational media consumption to four hours per week.
It’s not simply about reducing screen time.
It’s about recognizing that what we repeatedly consume influences what we think about, what we compare ourselves to, and where we direct our attention.
Consider the amount of information competing for your attention every day.
News. Social media. Entertainment. Opinions. Other people’s lives.
Some of it informs us.
Some of it inspires us.
And some of it simply creates noise.
The invitation is to become more selective.
Ask yourself:
Is this adding something meaningful to my life, or is it taking attention away from something that matters more?
7. Fast from something for 24 hours
Earley recommends a weekly 24-hour fast as a spiritual practice.
Traditionally, fasting involves abstaining from food, but the broader invitation is to examine our relationship with comfort, consumption, and immediate gratification.
Fasting creates space to recognize what has begun to control our attention or behavior.
For some, this may be a spiritual practice involving food.
For others, an additional exercise might be stepping away from social media, shopping, entertainment, or another habitual distraction.
The leadership connection is self-awareness.
Can I recognize the difference between something I intentionally choose and something I automatically reach for?
Sometimes the most revealing habits are the ones we find difficult to interrupt.
8. Practice a weekly Sabbath
Perhaps one of the most challenging habits for high-performing leaders.
A full day of rest.
Not a day to catch up.
Not a day to prepare for Monday.
A day to step away from work and embrace rest, worship, relationships, and renewal.
Many leaders have become so accustomed to productivity that rest can feel uncomfortable.
There’s always another email, project, or responsibility waiting.
And our capacity to lead well depends partly on our willingness to recognize our limits.
Rest isn’t something we earn after completing everything.
It’s something we need to protect.
And sometimes, choosing to stop requires more discipline than continuing to work.
Alignment is built through repetition
What I appreciate most about The Common Rule is that it doesn’t begin with a complicated strategy.
It begins with ordinary choices.
How we start our mornings.
Where we direct our attention.
Who we make time for.
What we consume.
When we disconnect.
How we rest.
These choices may seem small, but together they shape the way we experience our lives and the way others experience us.
This connects closely to the framework I use in coaching:
Awareness. Alignment. Action. Integration.
Awareness helps us recognize what’s happening.
Alignment asks whether our choices reflect what matters.
Action turns those intentions into behavior.
Integration makes those choices sustainable.
And that’s where habits become important.
Knowing your values is one thing.
Building a life that reflects them is another.
Where to begin
I wouldn’t suggest trying to implement all eight habits tomorrow.
For most leaders, that would simply create another list of expectations.
Instead, begin with a little curiosity.
Look at the eight habits and consider which one speaks most directly to something missing in your life.
Maybe it’s uninterrupted attention.
Maybe it’s meaningful conversation.
Maybe it’s rest.
Or perhaps it’s creating space to reconnect with your faith and the values that guide your decisions.
Reflect on
Before adding another habit or changing your routine, take a few minutes to notice what’s already happening.
Where does your attention go most easily?
Where is there a gap between what you say matters and how you’re actually spending your time?
Which of these eight habits creates the most resistance for you? What might that resistance be telling you?
Where have distraction, urgency, or constant availability started to feel normal?
What relationship, priority, or part of yourself could use more of your presence right now?
And perhaps the most useful question:
What’s one small practice that would help you live and lead with greater alignment this week?
You don’t need to change everything.
Choose one thing. Practice it. Pay attention to what changes.
To go deeper
If this framework resonates with you, I encourage you to explore Justin Whitmel Earley’s work directly.
The Common Rule Learn more about the framework, the eight habits, and additional resources
Explore the habits through this collection of short videos
If you’re ready for that next step, I’d love to hear your story. Schedule your complimentary Discovery Call.
Kristen Hodge, Executive Coach & Transformation Partner
Simple Details | Coaching & Consulting
Connection • Alignment • Growth
The framework and eight habits are the work of Justin Whitmel Earley. The leadership reflections and applications shared here are my own.
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